“Table-for-one sign” deemed legal (#105)

Beaconsfield, QC – Canada’s reputation as a polite, if not overly so, nation is about to make an abrupt about turn. The 180° about-face in the country’s worldwide eminence will likely be attributed to a recent provincial-court decision in which the elevation of the standard middle finger was deemed to be a right to freedom of expression covered by the Charter of Rights and Freedoms.

“Hear this? May I turn it up for you?”

In his 26-page decision, Judge Dennis Galiatsatos declared, “Flipping the proverbial bird is a God-given, charter-enshrined right that belongs to every red-blooded Canadian!”

His honour clearly doesn’t expect to be sued by his god, nor any Canadian suffering from anemia.

The Boy Scouts of Canada are looking forward to the return of their salute from those who commandeered it as a euphemism for what is likely to become Canada’s national “bird”.

Scout’s salute was often accompanied by, “Read between the lines!”

Former Prime Minister Pierre Elliott Trudeau could have refrained from mouthing, “Fuddle Duddle,” in parliament over 50 years years ago had Judge Galiatsatos’ ruling been released sooner.

Galiatsatos (left) about to make good use of his own ruling

In the imminently foreseeable future, Canadians of all ages, genders, colours, and ethnicities can stop apologizing as if having graduated summa cum laude from a finishing school, at which we learned to say, “Sorry,” and raise the “tall man” proudly.

Move over Whiskey Jack, Canada has a new national bird


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